I emerge like a tree from a dirty seed;

It hurts but I can handle this Nooooooo I am going to be here for a while. Happy face. Happy face. Surrender. Accept what doesn't change.  Witness the pain. Ignore the needle. Embrace freedom!  That's more like it. Not easy but beating pain one smile at a time. I am in control. Let's finish this and move on.  There is freedom at the end of pain. Stay. Conquer! And, Selfie with bestie Thanks, Pradeep Jr , Astron tattoos. I enjoyed watching the design come alive after I gave him a couple of reference pics but spoke more about the emotions and philosophies I wanted it to represent. This might very well be my only tattoo. He manifested it. Mighty impressed!

Nah. Jessa Crispin, the author of 'why I am not a  feminist' uses click bait statements and of course I expect Guardian to publish this. There is no sound reason to call out Sheryl Sandberg for trying to limit regulations because as per her she was protected by feminists (what logic is that). Sheryl could have been over protective as her job requires it and if Mark Zuckerberg attends the hearings, 'that's because he is the CEO and he is accountable. Sheryl doesn't deserve this vitriol. She has done more for women in opening up a dialogue, starting with not changing her name or identity after her marriage, dealing with her husband's death with grace, and even using it to help others. Jessa sounds too bitter. Jessa, since you have made it abundantly clear that you are not a feminist, please play on your own lane. We have enough issues to address and dealing with you highjacking the narrative is a distraction. The best part of being an adult is there is nothi...

Cyclone Gaja has uprooted lives. 33 are already dead and 80,000 have been evacuated. The farmers are facing the brunt of it. I hope that the Government deals with this horrible situation with grace. There i enough media attention when the flood hits prominent places. Let's not forget that natural disasters do not distinguish. Help out. People in Tiruvarur , Thanjavur, Pudukkottai, Dindigul and Trichy need us. I still couldn't find donation links. I will update when I do. May God have mercy on us.

Cool visuals!

It's beautiful how our thoughts are validated with synchronicities if we pay attention. I was thinking about the trade-off between feeling alive vs living life sedated only the previous day. I even sent that message to a friend. The next day, I was surprised to see this update on Jesse Elder's page. What does feeling alive mean to you? To me, it's about living our purpose. What's essential to living our purpose is seeking the answers to the following questions:- Am I feeding off the Universe? Am I allowing it to use my energy to support its expansion? Am I happy? Do I understand that our joy has over-arching benefits? There are far more comfortable ways to live life.  It's easier to live with a distracted mindset. We can be melancholic and then go through the motions of what's expected of us. We can detach, ignore short term memories, and be in a constant state of bliss. We can also let the bias of the world guide our decisions and thoughts. Be a sla...

Sometimes, I run away Away from the madness Away from the chaos If I am lucky, I miss my shadows If it's a normal day, I disappear into my light I weave a cocoon of misted sunlight There, I grow my wings I splash on my colours I grow I glow Sometimes, I hit the darkness Stumble on a cocoon that I didn’t weave A swathe twisted with rays of the dark night I am chewed in I am swallowed I don’t know the way back I don’t know if I would be back When I hide Even in my bright days I loved being found By the Divine source of life Like a Sunflower thirsting for the light In my dark nights I can’t call out All I need, all I hope for, all I care about is to be found

That wall you build around you is blocking your sunlight Those little locks around your voice rations your breathing You are your own prisoner And, you are choking to death So, fuck those rules Don't waste 5 minutes on fake small talk if all you need is a favour Don't ask yourself whose turn is it to split the bill There is no optimal time to visit Or the right words to life's usecases Hack the auto pilot mode in your head Wake up! Take a sledge hammer to your wall Stop the suicide of your authentic self Oh, don't bother searching for keys Breakaway Breathe... Run! Fly!! -Sajithra

ENLIGHTENMENT 1. There is compassion in destruction The flyaway ashes reveal an ancient fire The mirror that shows my ugly parts Becomes my guardian angel. 2. Not long ago, staying high on bliss was home I found darkness a trace of sunlight, just painted black Now, crystalized scales fall off my eyes I wake up and panic in the abyss Should the choices remain the same? Well, what's your poison?, the voice asks A pleasing lie Or an ugly truth I ask for neither The truth was always there And, the lie was my set of blinkers Break those horse tacks But give me a new set of eyes 3. I could go back to sleep Color nightmares into my personal rainbow. Make demons my dream-catchers And, when a skeleton lurks in the darkness Shout in jest 'Happy Halloween to you'. 4. I could remain wide awake Burn hot in the embers of truth Hedge my bets Sharpen the spears Wage my battles from an unstable, bleeding, dark crevice. Or 5. I could watch the battle but kno...

I found a mall under construction. Planning to spend time to access my hidden parts and work on my art. It's about purging. Having the courage to peel off the defenses. It's about tearing off the walls and the priming of social constructs. It's messy. I would either come out with a new perspective or make a choice to go back to the illusion. Either ways, a journey worth the pain. I might not be updating my blog at least for a week..

I had a long phone call with Sugi like the good old days. If everything works out well, after Sugi does her usual Dec stay at my home, I will plan a week in Singapore with her. Fingers crossed! Life is beautiful :)

Sugi has been quite busy with her new work and classes. She reached out today. When she did, I wasn't really surprised. Benj Anna and I had a conversation about telepathy earlier this week. Sugi and I definitely have that. Pauline and I had it too. Sensing energies, knowing when to talk, using similar words, and at times replying when the other person had only thought about that question becomes natural and so does synchronicity. It gets stronger with time and acknowledgement. That doesn't work with Benj Anna though and Sanju is not in my frequency either. You can only see the ones in resonance. It's a gift to find people with a connection that is much stronger than the physical reality. That's how life's mission becomes clearer because we are not meant to do this alone. Everyone who has walked the path of the Universe with impact had at least one person in their life with that connection. Cherish it when you find one.

Back home with the babies :)

4:39 It's raining. I need to get the kids! I wasn't able to get an Ola cab. Run through the rain and find an auto? That should be fun. Damn. I need to find an ATM for cash. Or hope that Ola has the online option autos avaiaavai.

'A star is born' is intense. Not the kind of movie one watches while thinking about a best mate's suicide. However, the movie spoke to me. I needed that. Bought a cool Carpe Diem T-Shirt. Pardon the chipped nail polish and the going for a morning jog face. That was the idea of having an off day. I don't care.

Should I have stayed back in my room with a book? Going to watch 'A star is born'. That should engage my mind.

After aimlessly wandering with this song  on loop blaring on my head phones, stopped for brunch at Cafe Noir Smoked Salmon Bruschetta and mocktail.

Today, I am planning to appreciate the good things in life. I have the entire day. So, planning to do things that I enjoy. It's appreciation day.  I am at Starbucks. I don't feel like having coffee but this is what I like. Almond Biscotti and a Lemon loaf cake. I will finish this and decide what to do next. 

Pauline, Happy birthday! I will see you soon enough!!  Beautiful Beautiful death!!! LYRICS Carry on my wayward son For there'll be peace when you are done Lay your weary head to rest Don't you cry no more Once I rose above the noise and confusion Just to get a glimpse beyond the illusion I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man Though my mind could think I still was a mad man I hear the voices when I'm dreamin', I can hear them say Carry on my wayward son For there'll be peace when you are done Lay your weary head to rest Don't you cry no more Masquerading as a man with a reason My charade is the event of the season And if I claim to be a wise man, it surely means that I don't know On a stormy sea of moving emotion Tossed about I'm like a ship on the ocean I set a course for winds of fortune, but I hear the voices say Carry on my wayward son For there'...

When people come together and agree on something that is not self-serving, expect miracles. The paths can differ but the source remains the same. When I was on a coffee break, this update made me smile. The kid was in the ICU on a ventilator. She got admitted for H1N1 influenza (swine flu) yesterday. 4 people died in Bangalore within 44 days because of this outbreak. More concerning with children. I do believe that when a group of people pray without selfishness, there is a manifestation of healing - but only if that's meant to happen. It's unfortunate when some preachers make it a parlor trick. If they could turn it on at will, they should stay in hospitals. It doesn't need to be dogmatic or religious. There is a higher power above us, a reality beyond our perceptions. When we focus on that, we will also remember who we are.

If you haven't seen eaglets learning to fly, go here to explore. There are very few things that are more satisfying. I should remember to take a video tomorrow. The old ones must have moved in during Aug, accounting the time to hatch and fly. I started spotting them everyday only around Sep though it was quite often for a couplr of months and now some new families are nesting too. Interesting! I found this story online but could not find the actual source. How inspiring! Don't overthink. Jump. Fly away! The sky is the limit. The nest of young eagles hung on every word as the Master Eagle described his exploits. This was an important day for the eaglets. They were preparing for their first solo flight from the nest. It was the confidence builder many of them needed to fulfill their destiny. "How far can I travel?" asked one of the eaglets. "How far can you see?" responded the Master Eagle. "How high can I fly?" quizzed the young eaglet. ...